Wednesday, August 1, 2007

I'm Restless

If you know me at all, I get restless sometimes. I have a tendency to go, go, go. Yes, my life has changed. Yes, I'm in the midst of it. Yes, I get a bit discouraged sometimes by that and others I'm just ecstatic (no, I'm not bipolar... just have a lot of energy, some say!!).

So, here's the deal. I get restless when something big has happened. Like after a marathon. What is my next race is the first question I always ask. I'm doing the same thing now. People call me crazy. Really, my family and friends tell me to slow down. I do too much. I can't do it all.

BUT. Here I go again. I'm not overly happy with the work situation right now, and that isn't helping. I decided to start preparing for a fall half marathon and a full. But that doesn't seem to want to quench this restlessness. So, I'm considering continuing my education. I'm thinking of doing an MBA program online. But I'm not sure how credible they are. I don't want to be away from my Sugar Plum for too long, so going to class seems a bit out of the question.

Part of it might be knowing my friend got married today. CONGRATULATIONS, I say!! Woohoo!!! And I'm so happy for her. I have a baby. Life changes... we're going with it. But I feel like with this next chapter, there might be something more. So, I guess you can call me crazy. I'm going to try to figure out how to get un-restless. (I could always start the process to adopt #2, but I'm not that crazy yet, HAHA, I'm having TOO much fun with Sugar Plum).

Really, I love my little SP. She's just amazing. And the funny thing is, I say that every day. She was sitting by the door again today (waiting for Mama?) when I got there. Too cute. :) I even got a big smile. She made my day.

That's why it makes work stress seem trivial. And important at the same time, because, well, frankly, I don't feel like tolerating being treated like a 2nd class citizen because I have a child, or because I'm a woman, any more. There, I said it. Bah Humbug.

Whine, whine, whine......that's what I feel like doing tonight. I know it is just my getting back to work and on a schedule... but I'm restless. What more can I say?

Peace.


PS. I'm trying to figure out what to call my little dumpling here, because I'd like to try to keep a modicum of anonymity (ha, big words...didn't know i had it in me, did ya?! hehe). I don't think I've done a very good job so far. So, I will likely use different 'fun names' until I pick one for sure. :)

5 comments:

  1. I get restless too once in a while. Actually, my biggest emotional pitfall is wanting too much and realizing there isn’t enough time to acquire it all (long story). That’s when the panic sets in. I normally try to walk it off or do some kind of exercise to give vent to all that combustion (music is a wonderful stress reliever for me). Future plans: I’d like to go back to school and finish my degree so I can apply what I think are worthwhile talents to a career that’s right up my alley. Certainly I have a job, but the question is WHAT do I WANT to do? I wish I had been as fortunate as some of my friends who knew they wanted to be doctors and engineers early in life, and subsequently became those things. But you and I can at least say we have friends and family. Careers come and go.

    Speaking of careers, I was thinking about going to jousting school. It’s a sport that is very rare and few can master. Perhaps a degree in Boom Box Anthropology might be useful in examining the current music trends of young America. You think Sony records might be interested? How about Mock Fedex Driver? The list is endless...

    Tom

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  2. Tom, you are too funny. You always seem to make me laugh. Thank you. Maybe we could learn jousting together!!! :)

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  3. Or a masters in Underwater Basket Weaving. I always wanted to learn that.

    Honestly, I think your restlessness is probably pretty normal. Nothing for nothing, but you did spend the last 2 years waiting for a baby and to be a mom. Now you have her, you are looking for a new "challenge". I know you have your marathons, and that's fabulous, but really, maybe you could take a class of something that meets only once a week. Like..I don't know, Dance or Tae Kwon Do or something. Something that YOU like, that would continue to challenge you.
    All right that's it. My 2cents worth of advice!! Hang in there. I hope you figure out soemthing soon. :-)

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  4. Great idea Shannon. Maybe I'll go to the YMCA, that way I could take Little M with me and not feel too guilty... do they offer basket weaving, I wonder?! ;-)

    Melissa

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  5. Tom is cracking me up... Boom Box Anthropology!

    Go for all of it- the marathon, the degree... some old saying, from somewhere: just do it.

    Life is short, you know?

    Glad to hear things are going so well with SP. She's such a cutie.

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